Friday 9th March
My second day conscious! It's really annoying having the feeding tube in my nose! I'm not in pain which is nice, I have IV paracetemol in the morning and that's it but I'm just lay in bed so that's possibly why! It's crazy how quickly you lose your muscle, I literally can't get my hand to my face so I have to keep stretching my arms and wiggling my feet. But there are 2 nurses just for me while I'm in the side room so they literally do everything for me, including sliding me up the bed when I need repositioning!
Today I had physio come round and I got out of bed! It was very weird, there's no strength in my neck so I literally can't lift my head up on my own! Once it's up it's okay but if it flops back onto the pillow I can't lift it up again. So the physio girls helped me sit up and then sit on the edge of the bed, I sat for a minute and just made sure I wasn't dizzy. It was very disorientating sitting up but it felt okay. I used a stand which had a base that you put your feet on and then you stretch your arms out, grab the handles and pull yourself up. I felt like I weighed 100 ton! I sat back down and did this again a couple of times.
Then in the afternoon physio came back and I used a zimmer frame this time and did a few steps stood still, it was such a strange feeling! Because there's no muscle in my legs it honestly felt like my legs had huge weights attached to them! But I walked up and down the corridor with my frame! I wasn't out of breath and it felt really good, other than the pain in my muscles! This was so exciting and I had a little cry when I got back into bed because I was so proud of myself and amazed at what my body could do.
Then later on I walked to the bathroom with my frame, it's not easy to walk with a drain, feeding tube, pacing box etc that all have to come with me! I sat in the chair in the shower and my nurse washed my hair for me which was lovely! And I put clean PJs on instead of a gown which made me feel so much more normal! This was the first time I'd seen my body and it was quite a shock! I was sat in the chair and looked down and I was covered in bruises and plasters, my stomach was huge and I had wires and the drain coming out of my chest which was weird.
My uncle Paul came to visit me that afternoon which was lovely and it was nice that I could sit up and have a chat and wasn't as spaced out. Later on my mum came with my sister and brought loads of cards and gifts from friends and family and my aunty Jenny came too with more gifts! And some lovely drawings from my little cousins! Even though I feel good, I feel like I'll be in the side room for a while just because of how weak I am. They kept telling me to eat so they could take out the feeding tube, they need to make sure I'm getting enough nutrients. But I couldn't eat because the tube goes down your throat so it scratches when you swallow which isn't fun. I also bit a chunk out of my tongue while the breathing tube was in so that's really sore and I can't taste stuff properly! So Jelly was my best friend and fruit, and Ciaran brought me some ice lollies!
On Friday my nurse also took out the central veins in my neck, I didn't realise I had lines in still because I had dressings on them but it didn't hurt having them taken out, I see it as one step closer to home everytime they remove something! There was a bit of chaos that evening as I had to take a couple of tablets and they made me sick because they hit the feeding tube at the back of my throat and then my feeding tube got blocked as they were putting medicine down it so they had to remove it which I was over the moon about!
I'm having to sleep on my back which isn't great but I'm getting used to it, and I'm sleeping for a couple of hours at a time because the nurses do their observations every few hours and I also need help going to the toilet, which is some event, but it's strange how quickly you stop caring about your privacy and dignity! But it nice at night, there's a nurse called Lauren who sits and chats to me in my room while she fills stuff out on the computer so I'm not lonely, and I have my phone and tablet now although my hands are so wobbly I can't text well!
So off to sleep to recover some more and hopefully tomorrow is even better than today!
My second day conscious! It's really annoying having the feeding tube in my nose! I'm not in pain which is nice, I have IV paracetemol in the morning and that's it but I'm just lay in bed so that's possibly why! It's crazy how quickly you lose your muscle, I literally can't get my hand to my face so I have to keep stretching my arms and wiggling my feet. But there are 2 nurses just for me while I'm in the side room so they literally do everything for me, including sliding me up the bed when I need repositioning!
Today I had physio come round and I got out of bed! It was very weird, there's no strength in my neck so I literally can't lift my head up on my own! Once it's up it's okay but if it flops back onto the pillow I can't lift it up again. So the physio girls helped me sit up and then sit on the edge of the bed, I sat for a minute and just made sure I wasn't dizzy. It was very disorientating sitting up but it felt okay. I used a stand which had a base that you put your feet on and then you stretch your arms out, grab the handles and pull yourself up. I felt like I weighed 100 ton! I sat back down and did this again a couple of times.
Then in the afternoon physio came back and I used a zimmer frame this time and did a few steps stood still, it was such a strange feeling! Because there's no muscle in my legs it honestly felt like my legs had huge weights attached to them! But I walked up and down the corridor with my frame! I wasn't out of breath and it felt really good, other than the pain in my muscles! This was so exciting and I had a little cry when I got back into bed because I was so proud of myself and amazed at what my body could do.
Then later on I walked to the bathroom with my frame, it's not easy to walk with a drain, feeding tube, pacing box etc that all have to come with me! I sat in the chair in the shower and my nurse washed my hair for me which was lovely! And I put clean PJs on instead of a gown which made me feel so much more normal! This was the first time I'd seen my body and it was quite a shock! I was sat in the chair and looked down and I was covered in bruises and plasters, my stomach was huge and I had wires and the drain coming out of my chest which was weird.
My uncle Paul came to visit me that afternoon which was lovely and it was nice that I could sit up and have a chat and wasn't as spaced out. Later on my mum came with my sister and brought loads of cards and gifts from friends and family and my aunty Jenny came too with more gifts! And some lovely drawings from my little cousins! Even though I feel good, I feel like I'll be in the side room for a while just because of how weak I am. They kept telling me to eat so they could take out the feeding tube, they need to make sure I'm getting enough nutrients. But I couldn't eat because the tube goes down your throat so it scratches when you swallow which isn't fun. I also bit a chunk out of my tongue while the breathing tube was in so that's really sore and I can't taste stuff properly! So Jelly was my best friend and fruit, and Ciaran brought me some ice lollies!
On Friday my nurse also took out the central veins in my neck, I didn't realise I had lines in still because I had dressings on them but it didn't hurt having them taken out, I see it as one step closer to home everytime they remove something! There was a bit of chaos that evening as I had to take a couple of tablets and they made me sick because they hit the feeding tube at the back of my throat and then my feeding tube got blocked as they were putting medicine down it so they had to remove it which I was over the moon about!
I'm having to sleep on my back which isn't great but I'm getting used to it, and I'm sleeping for a couple of hours at a time because the nurses do their observations every few hours and I also need help going to the toilet, which is some event, but it's strange how quickly you stop caring about your privacy and dignity! But it nice at night, there's a nurse called Lauren who sits and chats to me in my room while she fills stuff out on the computer so I'm not lonely, and I have my phone and tablet now although my hands are so wobbly I can't text well!
So off to sleep to recover some more and hopefully tomorrow is even better than today!
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